I know  we almost never been in that emotional area before, and i know u somehow concider it  kind of weakness  showing emotions and  sharing tears.. but i also know that deep inside you .. u have that unlimited love and care!
    I always wished u  would've said something .. i wished u would've hugged me and told me u love me, but u didnt..  and i thought it doesnt matter to me anymore!
    I  heard  that old song last night, it made me cry and i know when ever u hear it, it makes u cry  too..  inspite of all our diffeneces we  r so alike in many things!!
    I  tryed to call and tell u how much i love u but i couldnt.. i didnt know how to say it ,  but i know u felt it somehow but u couldnt say anything as well!!

WHY DOES IT HAVE TO BE THAT HARD TELLING U THAT I LOVE U AND I MISS U.. MUM...

    Walking around a huge park in downtown.. my husband with his little beard, me wearing my veil.. i got used on that wonder look in their eyes, how could she wear all that in a sunny day.. everyone is taking the shirts off and shes covering her hair as well!!!
we kept walking enjoying the unusual good weather until we reached the turn we should take.. i was looking across the street and i saw her wearing a veil.. i was so glad to see a veiled muslima among that nearly naked crowd.. i kept looking and in a second she turned her face around towards me, she saw me looking at her, am sure it was too far for her to see my smile but she waved at me and i happily waved back!!
my husband was laughing by that time.. he said thats so cute, u look like a couple of friends haven't seen each other long time ago!!! she was taking the stairs with someone i assumed he is her husband.. so we took our turn and started a new chit chat while i was taking some photos "as usual" and suddenly i heard a male voice saying assalam 3alykom.. so i turned to see her and her husband next to us!!
she said we saw u muslims and we thought why not to come over and say salam.. i told her how glad i feel they did and how touched i am with that sweet move..
we took sometime talking, exchanging phone numbers and promised to meet next day at elmasjid for prying jom3a..
After they left.. lots of thoughts came into my head.. "al7mdolellah 3ala ni3mat el7ejab" except for the veil we wouldn't ever thought about taking such a move, no one here talks to strangers!!
i thought how blessed we are muslims with our islam, it sais women should wear hijab.. maybe its meant to declare that this woman is a muslima and she should be treated and respected as a one..
another thought i had about what sayedna mo7ammad (pbuh) said "afsho elsalam baynakom"             "الا ادلكم على شيء اذا فعلتموه تحاببتم.. افشوا السلام بينكم"
its great how u can easily send smiles and salams to every one without getting strange looks back!!!
and finally i thought about what we call "so7bah sale7ah" which is one of the very important things i miss about home, my friends.. my dear muslim friends..
i'll always keep them in my do3a2 and i hope they wont forget me as well cause i really need it..

    When i started this blog upon a dear friend's advice.. everything was going smooth.. filling all the required data and importing my old blog then all of a sudden i faced a strange setuation... filling the country space in the application!!!
At first place i automatically chose Egypt, then i stopped for a minute thinking in a great fact in my life that am not in Egypt anymore!!
u can never imagine how long it took me thinking about that HOME COUNTRY issue! did they ask for the country i come from or for the country i live in!!?
very strange how i felt.. it was heart breaking ..
I know am not the first and i wont be the last one who had to live away from her country but for me it was very hard to imagine that, especially that i kept saying no no nonononono am not ever gonna leave this place but one day i found myself on a plane flying too far!!
Its very strange how fate controles our moves and lives.. even if we thought we r strong and capable of stading against everything to accomplish what we want, we may think its possible but at the time for the real step to take we find out the real troth and we believe in it...  its all in Allah's hands... it will happen if its meant to be, only if its meant to be!

BTW.. if u wanna know, at the end i decided to write Egypt for the country and Stockholm for the city!!